Bothersome comment types

February 11 2011 | offbeatresilience
Photo by ben dalton used by CC license

Across all three Empire sites and social media platforms, we can get hundreds of comments and emails a day. Here are just a sampling of the moderation challenges my editors and moderators deal with most frequently:

  • The Coincidence Enthusiast, who chimes in "OMG, MY NAME IS JENNY TOO!! CAN YOU BELIEVE IT!?"
  • The Special Snowflake, where the commenter explains why they are the special exception to whatever advice as been presented.
  • The Insecure Normal, who thinks they're crazy because they're totally normal. "OMG, am I the only one who gets hungry sometimes!? Sometimes I'm just like 'I need to eat some food!' It's so insane!"
  • The Values Projectionist, who firmly believes THEIR personal values are the website's values. Even when I personally share the values expressed, I do not appreciate being told that these values are everyone else's to be dictated.
  • The Non-Sequitur, "Hi I know this blog post is about bouquets but I had a question about something you wrote about relationships two years ago. help?"
  • The Oversharing Budgeter, where the commenter feels the need to inform everyone, "That's too expensive for me." Uh, ok then. Don't buy it.
  • The Martyr, who loves to talk about how they have it harder than anyone else.
  • The Professional, who likes to remind everyone "Ladies, trust me. I'm a professional [florist, designer, artist], you do NOT want to do these things yourself."
  • The Unnecessary Reminder, who loves to note how they're not doing whatever's being discussed in the article, and they don't miss it. By these people's standards, every single post should come with a disclaimer about how if it doesn't relate to you or your situation, you can just not read it.
  • The Lazy Searcher, who decides rather than type a question into google, they'll type it into a comment. "What's a groom's cake?" LMGTFY.COM!

Have you committed any of these commenting mistakes? If so, it's no big deal: we still love you!

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