The joys and pains of writing personal essays for Offbeat Bride

Originally posted on Megan's personal blog on April 4, 2011.

Offbeat Megan is pensive.
In five minutes from now, another one of my personal posts will be going live on Offbeat Bride.

Normally I write posts like 17 wedding bouquet alternatives for fearless brides, Rock 'n' roll wedding favors to match your kick-ass wedding or Geeky wedding cakes. These allow me to do my favorite things which is to write, connect with people, and (hopefully) help others. Invariably, my favorite posts are the personal ones though; No, he doesn't wear a ring, Romance and marriage and this newest one The F word. But these are also the most frightening ones I ever write.

I often let them sit in the queue for months and months, afraid to put them up for review, because I know that once they go live, it's like my soul is bared and has become carrion for our readers to pick apart, devour, or spit out if they don't like those particular pieces of soul meat that are my personal views.

I can't tell you how awful it felt when I posted about my husband's choice to not wear a ring, thinking that the post would be a platform for other people to say "I don't wear a ring either, and I don't think I should be judged!" Instead, I got comments like, "I wouldn't trust a man who doesn't wear his ring," "that doesn't seem right," etc, etc. Until it culminated in a public breakdown at the YMCA, where I'm pretty sure I scared the crap out of a little boy and his mother who were just trying to sign him up for a summer camp. At that point I just had to just stop reading the comments.

And there's always the fact that I will more than likely insult someone to their very core. I have duly earned the title of "the most offending writer in the Empire." Same as it does in real life, my sense of humor often rubs people the wrong way on the internet. Hell, even when I write light posts like an offbeat venue roundup, I somehow manage to upset people.

By now the F word post has gone live and the first few comments have not only been very supportive. But this one was downright AWESOME:

I totally get what you mean when people don't know how to react to you not saying that damned word but hey, you're fu@king Offbeat Megan! You do whatever you DAMN please!

And THAT my friends, THAT is why I love writing those personal posts.

However, I'm still taking bets on what will insult someone this time. I'm going with: "ARE YOU SAYING THAT PEOPLE WHO USE THE WORD 'FIANCE' ARE BEING SNOBBY!? *I* SAY FIANCE. I'M OUTRAGED AT YOUR ACCUSATION MADAM!"

I guess it's like anything in life — a give and take. By putting myself out there, I can connect with others who are like me, but and I can also piss people off who aren't like me, and vice versa. Either way, I love my job. The ups and downs of the roller coaster that is writing for Offbeat Bride is, at the least, never boring! 🙂

Update: After the post went live, and to this very day, I never actually DID receive a nasty comment. Total miracle, right? And that little F word post is now one of our most popular of ALL TIME.

  1. Megan…great post, as always! Just wanted to mention that the only way this post could have been better if it was "on a boat, motherfucker!!!"
    With some mermaids, T-Pain and Flippy Floppies.

    3 agree

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