Oh hi. Wait, what? It's summer, which means my postings here on the Empire get a little sparser because I'm, you know, actually leaving the house sometimes to go for walks or go camping or take selfies or whatever. BUT! This week I made staffers promise that we'd do favorite comments, because they're fun and ridiculous.
This is Offbeat Empire's archive of favorite comments posts.
Another week of Offbeat Empire comments, and another week of dramatic interpretations by Offbeat Empire staff! This week we have the debut video from Offbeat Bride's newest editor, Chris Wolfgang. (She's the one who produces the pretty posts in our wedding porn category — you may remember her "peacock wet dream" reference this week?) Also in attendance via video this week: the Managing Editor of Offbeat Bride and Offbeat Home & Life, Megan; as well as Caroline, our copyeditor, assistant editor of Offbeat Home, and resident Mistress of the Dark; and me.
Ok, ok! I know it's been forever since we've done favorite comments, but I'm going to make it worth the wait by doing more video staff interpretations of our favorite comments. Also, it's my birthday, and all my editors gave me the gift of wearing lipstick for our staff meeting this morning (dudes, when you work from home, that is an AMAZING GIFT!) so you get to see everyone looking extra fancy.
This week we're going to try something a little different with our noteworthy comment round-up… three of us have chosen to do interpretive readings of our favorite reader comments.
You guys! It's Valentine's Day, and for those of us who like culture jamming, this means very little about romance or boyfriends/girlfriends/zefriends and means very MUCH about arts & crafts, red & pink, and showering everyone we know with our affection. So, in honor of this this day of editor-on-reader LUV, please excuse us while we collectively ovulate all over y'all with our favorite sexy-pants comments from our favorite sexy-pants readers…
The thing about the Empire that you've probably noticed is that we love to talk about, joke about, and post about sexy sex stuff… whether it's featuring a guide to buying bedroom toys, or ogling an Offbeat Bride's amazing rack.
This in mind, it shouldn't be shocking to you that our favorite comments of the week are all about boobs and embarrassing toy stories…
Fridays can be rough for me, with a triple punch of editing all next week's posts for Offbeat Bride, hosting our weekly editorial staff video conference meeting thinger, and then also trying to scrape together editors' favorite comments from across the blogs. Last week, it didn't happen. This week, it's going to be quick. Come with me!
There are times when I'm reading random gossip blogs (I KNOW! Reading blogs for pleasure! I don't know how I can still do that), and look at the comment sections and am like "Grumble, how did this website win every single hilariously clever commenter every on the internet!?" This week, those commenters were YOU GUYS. There were so many hilarious and awesome comments that I'm not even sure where to start, so let's just hold hands and dance merrily through the wildflowers of y'all's hilariousness at random…