As you may or may not know, everyone in the Empire has their own Amazon affiliate account, which means, if someone purchases something on Amazon.com through our affiliate links, we not only get a tiny percentage of the purchase, but we also get to see what they have purchased. Now, we can't see WHO purchased WHAT, but that doesn't matter — I really delight in the truly random crap that shows up every now and then. Wanna see some of my favorite things purchased by Offbeat Bride readers?
This is my recent favorite: Andrew Christian men's super mesh thong with show it technology. "With show it technology"!!! That delights me to no-end. Whoever bought this just won my heart.
Keep reading for more things with less crotch in them…
Oh wait, there's one more crotch: "Cowboys Favorite faux jeans and chaps lounge pants for men." My favorite part is the totally random photo of wildflowers on the Amazon page. WTFs abound.
In awesome nerd news: They make Rebel Alliance car decals!
Someone bought a 5 pound bag of Gummy Bears. Now that's not the weird part — I'm assuming they were for wedding favors… or for a person who REALLY freaking loves them some Gummy Bears. But what WAS weird was that the photos on the Amazon listing introduced me to the Gummy Bear Desk:
Gummy bears have recently been a staple in our office. One of the guys on my team was out on vacation, so we decided to commemorate his return by gummy bearing his desk.
All in all, we used about 5 bags (25lbs) of the stuff to finish the job. Minus a few that were taste tested for quality control and/or subjected to microwave experiments.
I …. have no clue. Healing Rhythms from the Wild Divine Project (Biofeedback Software and Hardware for PC and Mac). Whatever it is it looks space-agey and cool though.
This backwards watch was totally random if not really cool.
I love learning about this stuff. Who knew there were these cool Cat in the Hat hat cutouts? Well now I do, and now you do too! The same person also bought Thing 1 and Thing 2 hair cutouts. And look how cool these things are when used at a Dr Seuss kid's birthday party!
Okay, who bought these hidden reindeer socks and can we be best friends?
Are you kidding me with this title!? "Captain Underpants and the Big, Bad Battle of the Bionic Booger Boy, Part 2: The Revenge of the Ridiculous Robo-Boogers" is by far the best thing I've ever read in my life (and I'm just talking about the title, not the actual book… which I haven't read… yet).
I've always thought that Eiffel tower would make a great weapon and now look — a replica of the Eiffel tower that is also a dagger! So, of course, I immediately added it to my roundup of offbeat cake knives.
Now, wanna see the most expensive item anyone's ever bought from my account?
This Powell Pennfield kitchen island! I got a whopping $57.33 for this baby. Thank you, anonymous kitchen remodeler!
For those of you who are interested in using your Amazon purchases to help support your favorite Offbeat Empire editors, you could always click on any of our affiliate links (featured on all four sites) and, you know, feel free to buy things to your hearts content. And every once in a while you should throw something weird in the mix to make us happy!